Being a Teenager hard.

Everyone is so judgmental. If you don't look or act a certain way, people don't like you. If you have any ounce of uniqueness in you, someone will find a way to put you down. If you're too loud, you're annoying. If you're quiet, you're a snob.

In high school, you can never win.

The thing I hate most? No one has a mind of their own. These are the years that we're supposed to discover who we are as people, and begin to figure out who we want to become. But if you openly express interest for anything that's not're shunned. The only people who know that I write are my closest friends. In middle school, I used to get made fun of for reading on the bus. The majority of my school is so incredibly one-dimensional, it's pathetic.

It's so true. And something I've definitely learned. I hate being around people that I used to consider "friends". People who go through friends like their nothing. How can two people be friends for so long, and then it's just thrown away. No fights, no big blowouts. You just act as though you were never friends in the first place. You forget about all the Friday Night sleepovers and guitar hero jam sessions. That failed attempt at making cookies back in sixth grade. It's just like, poof. Gone. At this point, I want to know why. Why do you act like you hate me? What did I do, other than be your friend? We'll never be friends again, I knew this years ago. It's just so hard for me to comprehend such extremes.

Um, how about every morning? Even though my closet is overflowing, I always feel like there's nothing to wear. I think every teenage has that moment, when you're rushing to get dressed and NOTHING looks good on you. And you're like "Shit! But I have to go!" so you just end up throwing on jeans and a sweatshirt. I will NEVER wear sweatpants, or pajama bottoms to school. I just...can't bring myself to do that.

I absolutely love my group of friends. I was never one to be a part of a large group, who was constantly doing stuff together. I'm more of a small-group of friends kind of person. I love how my lunch table can go from these deep, intelligent discussions about religion/life to pole dancing in a matter of seconds (Don't ask...) One of my best friends is just as much of a book nerd as I am, so I have someone to constantly geek out with. My other best friend is music-obsessed and we have pretty much the same taste, so that calls for frequent jam sessions. We all balance each other out so well. I love it.

I'm tired all the time. You're tired all the time. If you're not yawning on a regular basis, you're not a teenager. Between school and homework and dance and student council and just LIFE, by the end of the day I just collapse onto my bed. There is so much pressure put on teens today, and I think way to much is expected out of us. We need to do well in school, and do extracurriculars, have jobs, and volunteer. But what about us? I feel like I'm always on 20% battery.

Totally true. Sometimes I'm just so incredibly AWKWARD. I'm that person who always thinks of a good comeback after the fact. I wish I was able to come up with things off the top of my head.

 THIS. Every time I see these family friends of mine, the first thing they ask is whether I have a boyfriend. And it's so awkward. Because it's not like I don't want a boyfriend, per se. It's just that there's no one I want to date. Big difference. And with my extended family (aunts, uncles, etc) if I ever mention a guy that I'm friends with, their eyebrows lift up, as though they automatically assume that just because I talk to someone of the opposite sex I have a boyfriend or want said person to be my boyfriend. Talk about one dimensional.

This is the one truth of it all. Don't waste your teenage years surrounded by people who like causing problems. My friends and I never fight. No drama is definitely the way to go. I see/hear about fights all the time...and I'm like why are you even friends then? Surround yourself with positive influences. Make memories that when you look back you'll be proud of.

One thing I'm really working on is being more confident in myself. Confident in my appearance, confident in my writing, confident in my dancing. I'm extremely passive, the person who will just let things go. I absolutely hate confrontation, so I let things slide. I don't want to do that anymore.

This is what happens when I start thinking too much.

Oh, and because this amuses me xD

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Anonymous said...

I know what you mean - in this world, being unique is so often frowned upon, and I hate it! It's ironic, because the cliche that "someday you will work for me" is actually true!! Those computer geeks you make fun of? They'll probably go on to invent the next iPod. The kids in theatre class? They'll be the next actors and actresses and you'll be worshipping the ground they walk on. But people never see that - they just go on bullying people for being different and uncool. It's ridiculous.

And I think most people can relate to the "I come up with a good comeback later" thing. I know I can!

Plus, I love the friends you can joke with AND actually talk with. My friends and I do both, and I love it!

Good post!!

Anonymous said...

Oh, I forgot...I get the boyfriend question, too. ;) And my answer is almost always no! I've only had one boyfriend before...and right now, there's no one I'd want to date. There are hardly any boys in the homeschool group, haha!! ;)

Kristia S. said...

DUDE, you seriously, just like...explained my teenaged years. (I'm about to be out of them) EVERY teen goes through this, I definitely did. HA! I still find myself concerned with these things. Let's just say, it's harder as a teen, it gets easier as you near the big 2-0. It don't concern you as much, you're more focused on school, work, and pretty much just life.
I still find myself concerned for the repeat the conversation in my head and wish I had said or done something different. I guess I am still battling my confidence issue. It ain't fun. >_<

Marisa, you're not alone, girl. You're doing good, because you haven't given up on writing and you know of these things. Teens usually deny it.

Love you, girl! Keep strong and write long! <3!

With lots of love, God Bless, Kristia S.

Paige said...

I loved this post! I'm so glad you decided to do posts like this and book/ writing stuff too!
This one is really great and so relatable. I'm glad I'm not the only one.
The stupid boyfriend one. There's people I want to date but who knows if they'd ever date me.
You know my magical wonderful story.

The friendsships being thrown away.. gah. I have a story for that. And it's really sad because we were so close and now we feel weird even making eye contact in the halls. it makes me so upset.

She was the best friend I ever had and now it's like it never happened at all.
You're lucky you have a good circle of friends who are like you, I don't.

Great post!

JulieAnn said...

Hi Marisa!

What a great post and blog! I am currently a student teacher and am planning on using your post in my class. We will be discussing the life of a teenager and this post fits perfectly with our unit!

Thanks for sharing your thoughts!